It sounds crazy, right? There I was, at 2 AM, methodically going through my "impressive" network of professional connections, and hitting delete, delete, delete. My finger was cramping, but I couldn't stop. Because here's the truth: having thousands of connections had made me feel anything but connected.

Let me back up a bit.

For years, I played the networking game like everyone told me to. I collected business cards like they were rare Pokemon. I attended every mixer, conference, and "synergy session" (yes, that was really a thing). My social media numbers were growing, and my inbox was constantly full. On paper, I was crushing it.

But then came that wake-up call. It happened at yet another networking event, standing in a corner clutching my fourth cup of bad coffee, watching people scan name badges for "important" people to talk to. I realized I couldn't remember the last time I'd had a genuine conversation at one of these things. You know, the kind where you actually care about the answer when you ask "How are you?"

That night, something snapped. Maybe it was the caffeine overdose, or maybe it was finally hitting my quota of fake smiles. Either way, I went home and did something radical: I started being real.

The Great Connection Purge (as I now fondly call it) taught me something profound: The quality of your connections matters infinitely more than the quantity. But here's what nobody tells you about building meaningful connections - it's not about what you get, it's about how you show up.

Let me share the most embarrassing networking moment that actually led to one of my strongest professional relationships: I spilled an entire glass of water on my laptop right before a crucial meeting. Instead of trying to play it cool, I laughed and admitted I was a mess. The client later told me it was refreshing to work with someone "actually human."

Here's what I've learned about real connection:

Sometimes it means admitting you don't have all the answers. It's about listening without waiting for your turn to speak. It's showing up for people when there's nothing in it for you. It's being brave enough to be the first one to be real.

The funny thing? Since embracing this approach, I've actually built stronger professional relationships than ever before. But they don't feel like "networking" anymore. They feel like genuine connections with people I actually care about.

My new rules for meaningful connection are pretty simple:

• If I wouldn't want to grab coffee with them, I don't connect.

• I share the failures along with the wins.

• I help without keeping score.

• I'm honest when I'm not okay.

Recently, someone asked me for my best networking tip, and I think they were expecting something like "always follow up within 24 hours" or "perfect your elevator pitch." Instead, I told them: "Be interested, not interesting."

The most powerful connections I have now started with simple moments of genuine humanity - commiserating over parenting fails, sharing book recommendations, or admitting we're both figuring things out as we go.

So here's my challenge to you: Look at your connections (online and off) and ask yourself - how many of these relationships would survive a crisis? How many of these people do you actually know? Maybe it's time for your own version of The Great Connection Purge.

What's your story? Have you ever felt the pressure to network rather than connect? Share your thoughts below - let's have a real conversation about what meaningful connection looks like in today's world.

Until next time, Dr. Christopher Paul

P.S. Next week, we're diving into enterprise - and why my biggest business breakthrough came from breaking all the "rules." Spoiler alert: Sometimes the best business strategy is ignoring what everyone else is doing.